The 6.9 Strongly Worded Suggestions

Thus sayeth Dog to Bnengets There is but one Dog, I am the Alpha & the Beta, The Ralphs, The Vons, The Fonz, The Safeway, and when they are not on strike.. The Stater Bros.

I. You shall not get intimate with any other deity but me, unless I can watch.

II. Thou shalt not wear spandex.

III. Thou shalt not reject something of awesomeness, to do so is punishable by an indeterminate stint in the Inland Empire aka: Heck.

IV. Murdering other people is looked down upon, unless the victim is voluntarily listening to ABBA, or believes wrestling is real. Bad driving is also acceptable.

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V. Imaginary numbers are evil and will not be tolerated. Neither will irrational numbers...

VI. THUS SAYETH THE LORD YOUR DOG, PEOPLE WHO TYPE IN ALL CAPITALS ARE FUCKTARDS.

VI.IX Above all, thou shalt never jam one's penis in...